Episode 2 - We Are Back

—Great day yesterday, Joe! Brilliant it, was.

—Wha'?

—I said we'd meet 'ere. Where were yer?

—Ah.

—Well?

—I, er, I had a little problem.

—Yeah? What problem?

—Not sure I wanna talk about it, the caff is busy. Tell me about the day.

—Ah mate, the team came around on the buz. PUSB all over it. Flags everywhere. People well happy. It was great.

—Well, it's been a while since we were in the Premiership.

—Yeah, twenty five years, mate. You were old, in them days.

—Wha'? Fuck off, you.

—Ha! Got yer there! It was great, though. Frank Lampard got a hero's welcome. Right and proper, if yer ask me.

—Aye, true enough.

—It's a bit quieter now. Yer gonna tell me what 'appened to yer?

—In a bit, let a few more bugger off.

—Blimey. I dunno if a can stand the suspense.

—Go and get the sarnies in, that'll help.

—Cheeky sod! Right, I will.

...

—Here ya are, Joseph.

—Ta, Robert.

—Yampy sods, ain't we?

—You are.

—You make me like it.

—Nah, I talk about normal stuff. You're the mental one.

—Piss off! You're as bonkers as me!

—S'pose.

—Right, c'mon. Tell 'ow come yer missed one of the biggest days in Sky Blue 'istory?

—It's a bit awkward...

—It's alright, it's only me here, mate.

—Right.

—Go on?

—I fell asleep.

—Wha'?

—Yeah. Sound asleep. Didn't wake up until gone five.

—Fer fuck's sake! Is that all it was?

—Yep.

—There was me thinking yer'd 'ad some big life event. Jeez, Joe! You can't 'elp being an old fart.

—Oi!

—Well, fancy that? The Sky Blues celebrating all around the city. Happy people everywhere. And you were snoring yer bloody 'ead off!

—I know, alright? Don't rub it in.

—Yer know when yer woke up?

—Yeah?

—Did yer say: "We are back!"

—Ha! Bollocks! I should 'ave, shouldn't I?

—Yeah. Anyways, we are back, Joe.

—Yep, Play Up Sky Blues.

—Damn right.

—Yep, now go and get the coffee, can’t wash bacon down with fresh air, can I?