Andy Hawthorne Andy Hawthorne
May 16th, 2025

Hacking Haikus

Poems
Reciting poetry to my usual audience...
Reciting poetry to my usual audience...


I'll be honest, I do like messing with proper poetic form. In some cases, I'll mangle it completely. And in others, I'll twist it in some small way. Haikus are a 17 syllable form that have more rules than I care to describe. So, I said sod the rules and have fun. Here's what happened...

These legs are hairy.
They graze my fine material
I'm the posh trousers.


I walked in the woods
I got lost in all the trees
I'm still in the woods.

The ink shall dry up,
I'll be capped forever more,
Just a dead biro.

I have chilled insides,
Some say because I'm a fridge,
But I am a ghost
Boo.

The tarmac glows warm
I protect its fresh layers,
Where's the other cones?

More paper to stick,
More bloody staples killed off,
Use more paper clips.

Cotton and alone,
Yes, a sock, but I'm single,
Where art thou other sock?

Ah, toaster of bread,
You silver baker of crusts,
You make me nervous.


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