I've written a couple of novels, available on Amazon.
Old, skint, and completely fed up with the modern world.
Jack, Baz, and Ronnie are three sixty-something East Londoners who have spent their lives grafting. But when the world decides they are "obsolete" and kicks them to the curb, they find themselves in the same shitty boat: unemployed, broke, and wondering what’s left for a man of their vintage.
Their only refuge is the local pub, The Nag’s Head, where they spend their afternoons doing what they do best: ranting about the state of the world. But when an opportunistic producer captures their unfiltered, grumpy banter on camera, the "Grumpy Amigos" are born.
Suddenly, they’re viral sensations. It feels like the payday they’ve been praying for, but fame is a double-edged sword.
Behind the laughter and the YouTube streams, their lives are spiraling. They find themselves trapped between a police detective closing in on local corruption and an Irish crime syndicate that sees them not as "stars," but as the perfect cover for money laundering.
Caught in a pincer movement between the law and the mob, with Ronnie’s health failing and the bills piling up, the Amigos are forced into a high-stakes game of survival. From mopping floors at tech startups to navigating the murky waters of the East End underworld, they’ll have to rely on their wits—and each other—to make it out alive.
They’re Old, But Not Obsolete. And they’re about to prove it—one way or another.
Five food hygiene stars. A queue out the door. And a council bulldozer with their name on it.
Jack Porter and Sarah Angel finally did it. They took over Mick’s Cafe on the Roman Road, scrubbed the burnt grease back to silver, and turned a notorious Bethnal Green greasy spoon into a thriving local goldmine. Alongside their trauma-tempered mate Baz, they’ve built a well-oiled machine fueled by strong builder's tea, proper bacon sarnies, and relentless East End banter.
But the breakfast rush is about to get disrupted.
When a smooth-talking suit drops a Compulsory Purchase Order onto the Formica counter, the reality hits hard: a massive gentrification project is on the way, and the building is marked for demolition. If the council wins, the community loses its heartbeat—and Sarah is left holding a life-changing bank debt that could ruin her family.
Jack wants to step back and find peace fixing up old Morris Minors in a freezing lock-up, but he can’t run away from a fight when the women he loves are under fire. To sink the suits, the cafe crew will have to unite the market traders, trigger a PR nightmare, and launch a resistance movement loud enough that the council can't ignore them.
Written in a lean, rhythmic style, The Cafe is a fiercely funny, deeply human story about ordinary people refusing to be squeezed out by big money.
If you like your comedy dry, your stakes real, and your characters unapologetically working-class, pull up a mismatched chair and place your order.