Writing Funny

Alright? How you doing? I'm Andy. I write funny stuff. Now and then. Sometimes, I write serious words. About the important things in life. Such as why fast-boil kettles take ages to boil. Why custard creams haven't retained their quality, and so on.

But for this article I have decided to write about writing itself. Meta writing... I met a writing a while back. It didn't say much, but contained a lot of words.

I thought: I hope I could write like that one day. With such literary precision, prosodic mastery and utter nonsense.

So I sat down to write. I used a Bic pen and my notebook. No chance I'd use a computer or anything modern like that. I'd use an Imperial Good Companion typewriter if I could find the ribbons.

it occurred to me that there is not that much literature out there about how to write funny. Unless you happen to be from the other side of the fond. So, I set about to write down a few thoughts on the complexities of writing things that make people laugh.

It took me a while to think about what to write. After twelve hours and thirty seven minutes of careful thinking and testing of ideas... I realised I didn't have any good ones.

So, here goes.

First, be ready to...

Look, I know, right? Yes, you, reading this. I'm aware that in over 200 words, I've yet to say anything useful.

...Break the fourth wall. Which is the official way to describe the process of talking to your readers. In a direct manner. Like what I did a moment ago (Pfft! His sentence structure and grammar? Rubbish. -Ed).

Second, study the comedic techniques. But don't let the writing rules slip. Remember, good punctuation means not to be late.

There is a word in the writing lexicon you should familiarise yourself with. And you shouldn't confuse it with another word with similar phonetics.

The word I'm referring to is: 'Pinoculate". It is the process whereby you maintain precise control of the words. protecting against their misunderstanding.

Another word to be mindful of is: Sarchasm. It means "the gulf between the writer of amusing content. And those who don't get it."

—Hey, Arthur?

—What?

—Have I written enough for this piece yet?

—No.

—Do you have any more ideas?

—You think you've had any yet?

—Er, I thought so—

—You haven't.

Arthur is my internal editor and often quite grumpy (I heard that -Ed) so don't mind him.

Anyway, I reckon I've provided some useful examples for you. If any of it makes sense, please refresh the page.

And if all else fails, write a Limerick.

There once was a writer called Bart,
Who wrote slowly to create art,
Until he ate baked beans,
And learned what fast means,
His words came out in a huge fart.