You walk slow and tentative, the dark is oppressive, the forest gloomy and malevolent.

You take another step. Wishing once again, you had a torch, or even a match. For a moment of light.

Another step, tentatively.

CRASHHH!!

Searing pain. You have fallen. Into a deep pit of spikes. One is skewering your left arse cheek.

You move your head. And there it is: cake!

You turn slowly, reaching for one morsel of that sumptuous treat.

You take a bite.

It is in fact a Pepper X. You scream as the burn begins.

“Has anyone got any milk?” You yell.