—Subtle as a flyin’ brick.
—Who?
—The President.
—Of the Working Men’s Club?
—No, yer numpty. President Trump.
—Oh aye. Why, wha’s he done now?
—Well, ’ow’s this fer a lesson in diplomacy—
—Yer know I ain’t got any certificates.
—Wha? No. Shut the fuck up fer a minute, will yer?
—I mean political diplomacy. The president. ’E were sittin’ with the Prime Minister o’ Japan.
—Ah, righ’?
—A member o’ the press asks ’im why he didn’t tell everyone what ’e were plannin’ for Iran.
—Righ’?
—An’ the little Japanese PM’s sittin’ there. An’ he goes, “Why didn’t yer tell me about Pearl Harbour?”
—Fuck me. Did ’e?
—Yep.
—Jaysis. Tha’s brutal, innit? What did she do?
—Nuthin’. Sat there like she were suckin’ a lemon.
—Fuckin’ good one, tho’, righ’? What a laff.
—Yep.
—Sarnie? Brenda’s on today.
—Yeah. Although…
—Wha?
—I’m gonna be radical.
—Oh? Yer not gonna ask for low‑fat spread or some shit?
—No. Me bollocks, I am. I’m gonna ’av a sausage sarnie.
—Oh, now there’s an idea. I’ll join yer.
—Righ’, I’ll go an’ get ’em.
—Great. If yer see anyone Japanese, don’t ask ’em about surprises.
—Yeah, we’ll leave tha’ to President Trump.