That ‘Madferit’ Bloke

Burnham, right? My news feeds are full of him. I get it. He’s going to be the new PM.

Now look, I’m not going to get political. I don’t like politics. I’d say anyone who wants to be a politician, is a person who should never be allowed to be one.

But, Burnham? Something is off. I didn’t vote for him. None of us did. There’s that. But another thing: he sounds like a man of the left. And I mean way over on the left.

Maggie Thatcher? Blimey, Not a fan. Never. But she did say this:

Socialist governments traditionally do make a financial mess. They always run out of other people’s money.

Hmm. I’m not a politics expert. Or an economist. But something is ringing true about that quote. From what Burnham is saying so far. And from what the current government is doing. I mean, the last lot didn’t do much right, did they? But this lot? They don’t like people with any money. Even if it’s a few bob in savings.

But that’s not the thing that’s bugging me.

Here’s the thing. His clothes.

I’m half expecting him to show up in a bucket hat and an Oasis t-shirt. He’s casual. I reckon he thinks he’s cool, or something. But for a bloke who wants to be prime minister? He’ll have to buy a suit. Dressing smart matters. Still.

I saw him in one the other day. Fine. But mate, have a word with yourself. Suit up. I’m not a snob. Never wear one myself. But, then, I’m not prime minister. Nor likely to be.

My mate at work asked me why I give a shit.

—Who cares what he wears as long as he does a good job?

—Yeah, s’pose.

—You’re old school, mate. It’s not all suits and shiny shoes these days.

—Right, but if you lead a Nation it should be.

—Says who?

—History, mate.

—Ah, yeah. Old shite. Nobody cares.

—I reckon they do.

He laughed, shook his head and got on with his day.

Fine. But Mr bloody ‘Madferit’ isn’t convincing me he’s got a plan — or a decent suit.